


The Tour

by godcomplexfics (godtiercomplex)



Series: dysfunctional family funtimes [9]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Drunk Sex, Gen, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 08:04:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9712631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godtiercomplex/pseuds/godcomplexfics
Summary: During Haise’s tour across Japan, Shuu decides to join him.In which, Shuu hides his own insecurities by being even more paranoid than usual, Haise just wants him to stop, and Hide is mildly amused.(Reposted due to Ao3 mishaps)





	

Shuu called ahead to give warning as requested, and Haise to his surprise, agreed to let him come visit him in Kyoto. It was two days after Valentine’s and any chocolate he had wanted to bring Haise had already been eaten in his negligence by Chie the night before he left Tokyo. That was why he showed up almost completely empty handed to the hotel Haise texted him directions to.

He felt adrift, ungrounded and far too shaken. He had cheated, had slept with someone else and destroyed with his own hands what he wanted most--if it ever got out. He had sworn to Hinami that he and Ayano just hadn't clicked and she had believed him. She had left it at that.

Now all he had was a small suitcase for a few nights and hope in his chest. Hope that Haise would never find out. Hope that it'd turn out alright. Hope for the impossible.

 

 

The elevator doors opened and, "Oh, there you are," Nagachika said with a smile and a wave. Shuu had been standing in the lobby waiting on Haise but now he frowned and glared at Nagachika.

"Where is Haise?" he asked.

"Up in the room, he's reading some of his fanmail and trying to decide what to do with all the treats he was given. Come on, I'll walk you up." Shuu reluctantly followed Nagachika up to the room, ignoring his attempts to make idle conversation.

Haise was surrounded by flowers and boxes, gifts from fans Shuu was sure. He had on his black reading glasses as he looked over handwritten notes while sitting on the hard floor of the hotel suite. There were two bedrooms and that made Shuu uncomfortable as he looked at Hide’s ease in the room. So, Shuu checked with Nagachika just to be sure, and Nagachika had laughed, but the other man had assured him that his room was down a floor.  

“Haise,” Shuu said, and just that, unable to say anything else when Haise looked up. He wasn’t smiling but he wasn’t frowning either. Shuu had just broken his concentration.

“Oh, alright, Hide found you then. Thanks, Hide,” and now he smiled, and Shuu’s heart clenched tight in his chest.

“No problem, Haise. Have you decided what you want to do with all the fanmail yet? Maybe Tsukiyama-san can help us out.”

“With what?” Shuu asked as he took a seat as close to Haise as he could without damaging any of the gifts like he wanted to.

“Should Haise write letters back or just make a post on his blog thanking everyone?”

Tsukiyama frowned, “Haise doesn’t have a blog.”

“I do,” Haise said, “Hide mostly posts for me though.” His lover shrugged, “The company recommended it.”

“He has so many followers, it’s incredible for a debut author,” Nagachika sounded both proud and fond as he looked at Haise. Shuu hated him even more than before when Haise’s voice softened just a bit.

“It’s all thanks to your hard work, I couldn’t have done it on my own,” Haise said, and then looked at Shuu, “Hand me that pile?”

Shuu handed it over, and sighed, “When do you leave for your signing?”

“In another hour or so. It’s just down the street. Hide and I took a tour earlier, and--” Haise lightly rambled on as he looked down at letters, and smiled at their content. He never smiled like that for Shuu anymore. It was all frowns, and half smirks, or even worse a blank face and nothing. It made Shuu ache in a bad way,and he hated each anonymous person who got a smile to appear on Haise’s face. He wanted to burn all the letters, each carefully organized stack.

A flash went off, and he looked up to see Nagachika holding a camera and grinning.

“That’s going on the blog!” Nagachika declared, looking at his picture on the digital screen. Shuu felt sick, and it must have showed on his face because next he knew Nagachika was asking if he was alright or not.

“I’m going to lie down,” Shuu said, “The train, you know, it took some time.” That was a lie, in honesty he just hadn’t been able to sleep since the incident and his mistake.

He headed into the bedroom, and shut the door on Nagachika getting down to Haise’s level and handing him another pile of letters. It made him sick how easily Nagachika had slipped into Haise’s life and how well they got along. It terrified him to think that one day, Haise might decide he wanted Hide more than Shuu.

 

* * *

 

 

“He looks really bad,” Hide said once Tsukiyama was in the bedroom. Haise just sighed and kept reading the letter. It was from a teenage girl from the looks of the handwriting and from the name at the bottom.

“She liked  _Welcome, Good Night_ ,” Haise said, “And can’t wait to read my newest book. She goes on about a scene I found interesting myself--but,” he described it, and Hide sighed. “What? Is that odd?”

“It takes all sorts,” Hide said, “After all, you wrote it, does that make you odd?”

Haise considered that, folding up the letter and putting it in his favorites pile. He picked up the next letter and read it twice before sighing, “I think I’m odd. Don’t you?”

“I know you’re odd,” Hide said, “But a good odd. It helps you write unusual stuff.”

“Do you really think people will like Tanaka’s story?” Haise was helping to promote it, and they were giving away a few signed copies, but it wasn’t as exciting as he’d dreamed it’d be. It was nice to interact with the fans, but the long nights away from home were starting to get to him. He missed his kids.

“It’s already making waves! The reviewers liked it. You’re a hit,” Hide laughed, “Be more confident.”

Haise nodded, and then looked at his phone, “Time for us to get ready, I guess.”

“Don’t get too caught up with Tsukiyama-san,” Hide joked on his way out, “I know how reunions can go.”

“You also know we’re not like that,” Haise ushered him from the room, and then considered the mess before sighing and going to the bedroom where the in-suite bathroom was. Tsukiyama was on his face, and had a pillow over his head. He did seem unwell, and had even sounded unwell over the phone.

“If you were sick you should have stayed home,” he said as he pulled out his chosen outfit for the meet and greet.

“I already missed spending Valentine’s with you,” Tsukiyama’s voice was muffled, “At least let me have this.”

“Whatever,” he said, and went into the bathroom. When he came out, fully dressed, Tsukiyama had fallen asleep. There was something wrong, and he should care, but he didn’t as long as Tsukiyama kept it to himself.  

He went out with Hide, and met some of his fans, and afterwards at Hide’s insistence called Tsukiyama to see if the man wanted to drink with them or get dinner. There was no response, so he and Hide hung out alone until the hours and drinks slipped away, and they headed back to the hotel.

“I think that went well,” Hide said as Haise steadied his hand to get into his now occupied hotel room.

“I think so as well,” Haise said, when the door finally unlocked. He held it open, and almost invited Hide in, but yawned instead.

“Goodnight, Haise,” Hide said fondly, and then went to his room. Haise watched his back for a moment and then went inside the suite. The lights were off, so it took him a moment to notice Tsukiyama by the wide window. He was speaking quietly on his phone, and it was a sharp hiss of “Haise cannot,” that caught his attention.

“Tsukiyama?”

Tsukiyama stilled, and shut his phone. “Haise,” he said, and Haise could tell that whatever had been bothering Tsukiyama might become his problem if he wasn’t careful. “Sorry that I missed your earlier call, I was still sleeping. How did the signing go?”

“It went great,” Haise said, the alcohol made his lips looser than usual and he ended up rambling. He explained the venue and then the people who had came until Tsukiyama was in front of him and squeezing his hands.

“I wish that look on your face was for me and only me,” Tsukiyama said, “Can’t I have something that’s just mine?”

Haise paused, truly considered that for a moment before laughing, “No. You already get more than you deserve from me. I’m not yours, Tsukiyama, anymore than you’re mine.”

Tsukiyama flinched, and looked like Haise had hit him.

“I am yours,” Tsukiyama said, “I have always only been yours.”

He sounded broken, and destroyed, and Haise wasn’t sure why when what he had said was a typical response from him. He hadn’t done anything outside of their usual to Tsukiyama. It was Tsukiyama that was off, that was trying to throw Haise off. But Haise, even tipsy as he was, refused to be moved.

He took hold of Tsukiyama’s hands, and pulled him into the bedroom. In the end, their best communications were made this way.

Tsukiyama wasn’t his, but he was something to Haise, just not what he wanted to be. Never would be.

He wasn’t Tsukiyama’s and never would be. The chance for that had long been lost.

“Okay,” Haise said, and his hands weren’t exactly steady as he undressed himself, but neither were Tsukiyama’s as he removed his own clothes and that was okay. Even if something was wrong, and nothing was okay, this was okay.

 

* * *

 

 

He could smell the sweet liquor on Haise’s breath when he kissed him. He could taste it as well as Haise pushed him down on the bed in the main bedroom. The moon cast a pale glow over everything from the halfway parted curtains

“If this is over jealousy for Hide again, you really need to get over that,” Haise said, hovering above him with a grim look.

Tsukiyama couldn’t resist making a show of looking over Haise’s naked body for kiss marks not left by him. “Not just Nagachika,” he said, “You have scores of other admirers as well. I need to lock you away in a cage.”

“How about no.”

“I should tattoo my name across your chest,” Tsukiyama said, and placed his hand on Haise’s chest, already able to see the lines in black and purple.

“What? No.”

“I will buy you a necklace with my stamp on it.”

“Stop being so ridiculous,” Haise said before kissing him. “I’m not a pet for you to collar.”

“Then,” Tsukiyama said, “wear my ring, show the world you’re mine.”

“That doesn’t even deserve a response. I’m not something you can own, Tsukiyama. Not something you can buy. I’m not. . . I’m just not, and never will be.” The words came pouring out, and Tsukiyama stared up at Haise, a hurt look on his face. Haise looked away, and then kissed his neck. Haise never left marks on him, not even for revenge for how many marks Tsukiyama left on him. So it was a surprise when there were teeth against his throat, and he felt a hard suck.

“Haise?”

“What?” the smaller man muttered as he shifted downwards.

“Nothing,” Tsukiyama said at the second bite, this one against his chest, “Nothing.”

Tsukiyama watched Haise kiss his way down his body. Tsukiyama gave his responses openly and easily, each whimper and gasp freely given. He loved Haise so much, and wanted to stay like this forever. It was easy to pretend, to know that Haise had to feel something for him beyond lust when he was caring for his needs so patiently. And Haise was, had always been, an attentive lover. Tsukiyama had prided himself on being on himself, until he had met Haise, and hurried encounters had started to become the norm due to the children.

It was hard to have lengthy encounters outside of hotel rooms. It was harder still for him to sleep without Haise around. He wanted to bottle Haise’s scent but also wanted his body to be Tsukiyama’s pillow forever. He couldn’t function right apparently when Haise was out of sight. That was why he had made that hideous mistake, that was why he had ruined everything--

Haise’s tongue drew his attention as he gave a slow suck to one of Tsukiyama’s balls, and then kissed the inside of his thigh. Tsukiyama was surprised that he had drifted away, lost in the thoughts of what he had done, and how he had to keep it a secret. Chie understood, or so she claimed.

But Tsukiyama didn’t trust her. He couldn’t afford to lose Haise. He would lose himself if he did.

 

* * *

 

 

Tsukiyama was in another world as he so rarely was when they fucked. Typically, he was louder than this, he was more vocal. Now he was subdued. Haise realized he was frustrated when Tsukiyama smiled at him, and said, “You look so beautiful.”

Haise rolled his eyes, but that was all the flattery Tsukiyama had for him as he fell silent again, and that left Haise a bit more frustrated and uneasy. This was his vacation, he didn’t need Tsukiyama to come with his problems and ruin it. He was tempted to kick him out of his room.

But, he would seldom admit this, he did like having sex with Tsukiyama. But the way they typically did, and not with him acting all serious on him.

And honestly had Tsukiyama really mentioned a ring earlier? He was too drunk for this. And he was starting to suspect that Tsukiyama was as well.

A drunk Tsukiyama was one he rarely dealt with. It would explain the oddness of this whole encounter. That in mind, he relaxed.

“We’re drunk,” he said.

“Yes,” Tsukiyama readily agreed, “But I still want you. I want everything you can give to me. I want all of you.”

He just sighed, and took Tsukiyama’s dick into his mouth, sucking nice and deep as he went up and down on him. He wasn’t willing to give Tsukiyama anything of him, but he was more than able to take things from Tsukiyama. It was a fair exchange when Tsukiyama was in his hotel room, inside his life, inside his head to a certain level. Haise didn’t want Tsukiyama, but he had him.

He pressed fingers against Tsukiyama’s hole, and noticed the way he tensed on them. Haise stopped sucking Tsukiyama’s cock slowly, and replaced his fingers in his hole with his tongue. It wasn’t something he had ever done before, but he understood the general idea. Tsukiyama’s hand gripped his hair and he said something in French that Haise hoped Saiko never learned. Haise’s tongue moved slowly within him, and he pressed closer as Tsukiyama whimpered, sounding like all his attention was back on the two of them.

He kept up his treatment, licking him open, and soon was able to thrust his tongue in and out as Tsukiyama’s legs shook around him. By the time he finished, and was able to press two fingers inside of him, Tsukiyama was quietly moaning like he typically did.

Haise grabbed the lube from underneath Tsukiyama’s head, and spread it on his fingers. He opened up a condom with one hand, and for once Tsukiyama didn’t complain about it. He entered him, and Tsukiyama stared at him the whole time, almost teary eyed until Haise looked away.

All that mattered was them now, Haise figured, and maybe that was selfish, but he had had a long day. And Tsukiyama didn’t seem to mind if his gripping Haise’s back and leaving marks was any indication. He was always marking Haise. It was enough to drive anyone to madness. But instead, he rocked against him, kept up his near brutal pace, gripped his thighs as Tsukiyama wrapped his legs against him.

“Love you, love you, love you,” Tsukiyama chanted, and Haise didn’t believe him, but he didn’t stop fucking him into the bed either. There wasn’t any big change when he came, and when he finished Tsukiyama off. He went and got a towel to clean Tsukiyama up, and heard a phone ringing in the other room. He ignored it as it wasn’t his, and tossed the towel at Tsukiyama. He went back into the bathroom to clean himself up.

He found a fresher set of boxers, slid into them, and joined Tsukiyama in bed.

It wasn’t like usual, Tsukiyama clung just a bit more, harder even, but it wasn’t too dissimilar to normal.

 

* * *

 

 

In the morning, Haise was gone out of bed, and Shuu panicked. He tugged on a robe, and then marched out to the living room find Haise and Nagachika drinking coffee while studying a map.

“Oh, you look better,” Nagachika said, “A good night’s sleep will do that for you.” He sounded far, far too amused. Shuu glared at him.

“Go get dressed,” Haise said, sounding tired, “We’re going to go visit some temples. You can come if you want.”

Shuu began to complain, but as he was naked underneath the robe he went and showered. As he was doing his hair he noticed faint bruising around his neck, and couldn’t help but smile slightly. Haise had for the first time ever left his mark on him. When he came out, Nagachika and Haise were pressed close on the couch looking at Nagachika’s camera.

“I’m thinking this one, and this one for the blog,” he said. Haise nodded at Nagachika’s suggestions, and made his own. It set a low fire in Shuu’s gut to see them so close together. He came and stood behind them, leaning in to look at the photos as well. Haise gave him an unamused look.

Nagachika was no Chie, or any of the other photographers that Shuu had worked with all over the years, but there was something about the photos that appealed to him.

It came to him as they were packing up to go, that it was because there was a clear affection from the cameraman towards the subject obvious in it.

He held Haise close on the way to the temple.

Nagachika took photographs, and Haise did too, and they acted like a couple of newbie tourists. They were childish in a way he rarely saw Haise act with the responsibility of raising four children. Nagachika brought that out in Haise.

Society would have to forgive him for kissing Haise roughly after a while, just a reminder of who Haise was with. Nagachika laughed, “Can’t put that on the blog,” he teased.

“Don’t tell me you took a photo of that,” Haise complained.

“Well then I won’t tell you that.”

Shuu was torn between wanting to see or not, but eventually settled on sighing, “On to the next one then?”

He gripped Haise’s hand again as they walked, and refused to get out of the way of some of the shots since it would mean letting Nagachika touch or be overall too close to Haise.

Anyone who looked at Haise in the same way that Shuu did was not to be trusted.

“You’re being ridiculous,” Haise said when they were getting lunch. Nagachika had stepped out of the restaurant to take a call. “You know that Hide’s my friend.”

Shuu also knew that Nagachika wanted Haise.Who wouldn’t? The only reason that they hadn’t hooked up was because he had staked a claim on Haise. It was alright for him to renew it. Especially in light of what he had done. Haise wouldn’t fight for him, he knew that. Haise would let him go in a heartbeat, so it was up to Shuu to fight for them.

He made up his resolve as they an offering at the temple and went on to the next.

 

* * *

 

 

“He’s just jealous,” Hide said after lunch at the next temple, “Do you want me to leave so you guys can talk?”

Haise just gave Hide a look. Obviously he wanted nothing to do with whatever was going on with Tsukiyama. And Tsukiyama was always jealous so this wasn’t anything new per se. Just more annoying than usual with his extra clingy behavior.

“Right, right,” Hide said with a grin, “That’s fine then.”

Hide was finding this whole situation laughable, which would bother Haise if that just wasn’t how Hide was. He sighed.

“This isn’t funny.”

“Then talk to him.” Hide looked serious for a moment, “That’s the key to making any relationship work.”

“We’re not in a relationship,” Haise pointed out, “And I don’t want to make anything work. I want him to stop being more annoying than usual.”

Hide started to say something, but then shook his head, “Alright, then talk to him.”

Haise sighed, and Tsukiyama got off the phone and came back over to join them.

“Sorry,” he said, “Kanae is complaining about things.”

“Right,” Hide said, “You leave tomorrow. Hopefully those have faded a bit more by then.”

“Those?” Haise asked. Hide pointed at his own neck, and smiled at Tsukiyama who also looked a bit lost. Haise noticed for the first time that his annoyance had blossomed into purple bruises against Tsukiyama’s neck. “Oh.” It wasn’t something he had ever wanted to do before, he had just been so frustrated that before he knew it, he had marked Tsukiyama in a way he had never done before.

Hide laughed slightly, as Tsukiyama put a hand to his neck and felt the skin there.

“What?” Tsukiyama asked.

“Hickeys,” Hide said helpfully, sounding far too amused--probably had been amused the entire day now that Haise thought about it. He scowled as Tsukiyama smiled.

“I see, I see, yes!” Tsukiyama declared, and then took Haise’s hand and pulled him away from Hide.

“Hold up, we can’t just leave Hide--”

“Haise, don’t you see that this is something important? Finally you have marked me as your own! You truly do care for me.”

“That is not at all what I did,” he pointed out, and then couldn’t figure out how to explain himself. He kept his voice low, in respect for the temple they were visiting, and in respect for his own privacy concerns. He let Tsukiyama pull him further away from Hide.

“That is exactly what you did. And now Hide knows--”

“Honestly, what is this obsession you have with Hide? It’s not like I’m going to cheat on you with him or something.” Haise paused, “Actually, yeah, I can’t cheat on you because we’re not dating, but also I don’t have time for that.”

“Yes, because we are connected in a way that goes beyond dating,” Tsukiyama said, and when had they gotten to such a secluded part of the temple? He was sure he had seen a _Do Not Disturb_ sign at some point. Tsukiyama was as bad as the children.

“We’re connected in the sense that you’re a crazy stalker and I’d rather not involve other people in this mess.”

“Because you care for me, that’s why you would never stray,” Tsukiyama insisted, and Haise didn’t know what lines he was reading between but he needed to listen to the actual content of what Haise was saying.

“I don’t care for you,” Haise said. “Honestly, I don’t.” Tsukiyama released his hand, and he started to turn to go.

“Wait,” Tsukiyama unbuttoned the first few buttons on his shirt, and okay he had been more frustrated than he thought because there were a lot more purple stains against Tsukiyama’s skin the more he looked. Tsukiyama looked satisfied at the expression on his face. It could only be mild horror and shock. “Yes, you did this. Don’t tell me you care nothing for me when the proof is on my body now.”

“We fuck sometimes,” Haise said, hiding how shaken he was in his fists, “That’s all. I let you continue to stalk me, that’s all. If I feel anything for you it’s pity.” His hands stopped shaking and he relaxed. That truly was the extent of their relationship.

“Pity,” Tsukiyama said, “that’s just another type of love.”

“It really isn’t.” Haise waved a hand, “I’m going back to Hide. Don’t linger, I’m not going to be held responsible if you get in trouble for trespassing.”

He left Tsukiyama, and went back to Hide who was taking photos.

“Left more hickeys?” Hide teased. Haise just thumped his shoulder with his hand.

 

* * *

 

 

On the train ride back, Shuu couldn’t stop himself from touching the lingering marks on his skin. The lesser of them had faded slightly, but they were all still violently a mix of purple and blue and some of them even black. Haise’s affection shone through, no matter what he claimed otherwise.

Chie called him, and whatever she heard in his voice satisfied her.

“There we go,” she said, “That’s my Shuu.”

“I’m not yours,” he said. And the blossoming rose against his chest spoke the sincerity of his words, “Not yours at all, anymore.”

She laughed, and he laughed with her. He was content for now.


End file.
